


The Idiot

by jinxy1991



Category: Naruto
Genre: Donkey Sakura, Kekkei Genkai | Bloodline Limit, Rinnegan, Sharingan, Strong Uzumaki Naruto, Team 7 - Freeform, Uchiha, Uzumaki - Freeform, bitchy Sakura, rinne sharingan
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-24
Updated: 2017-05-22
Packaged: 2018-10-09 22:06:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10422822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jinxy1991/pseuds/jinxy1991
Summary: Naruto has always played the idiot the loud annoying dobe that people looked down onbut the truth is he's a tactical genius and far more powerful than all the Kage.After becoming a Genin he drops his disguise. His team discovers secrets that not even the Hokage knew about and Sasuke is sent on a ride full of questions.





	1. The Mask

(Naruto's point of view age 10)

Whispering some were even pointing "demon" a woman whispered her children still holding her hand glaring. the rest of the walk continued like this as I was heading to the ninja academy wearing this stupid kill me now orange jump suit and some weird blue goggles that I really don't see the point in wearing on my head. "~Come on kit you look cute~" Kurama said inside his mindscape 'Fuck off Kurama' he thought earning a growl from the fox "damn Jiji" he muttered under his breath remembering why the hell he was even doing this.

(FLASH BACK) sparkles and confetti)

(Hiruzen point of view)

'He's gonna kill me. damn but I have to' he thought looking at the blonde checking him over quickly he was wearing black sweatpants dark blue sweater (that frankly was a little too large for him) and a pair of black sandals. 'this is no good he looks to cute' he thought closing his eyes and trying to picture lemons shivering at the thought. (I hate lemons :P) "what's wrong?" Naruto said leaning closer his eyes peering into his. "guh" he shuffled back quickly in his chair.

(Naruto's point of view)

'god Jiji is such a pervert' thought Naruto inwardly hearing Kurama chuckle. "so why did you call me here?" he stood up properly again and watched the old man visibly relax. "well Naruto, I want you to attend the ninja academy" he said looking him straight in the eye to let him know he was completely serious. "why though?" "I mean I don't particularly want to be a ninja" he shrugged. "I know Naruto but you are strong and we need strong shinobi. he turned his eyes away from the boy "Jiji what are you hiding. you would never suggest this unless." he paused eyes turning cold letting out a snarl "fucking Danzo! I spend one year in the anbu and he thinks he owns me!" I slammed my fist splitting the hokage's desk. "Naruto!" he yelled. slowly I got a hold of myself still giving a cold look. "what do I need to do" I spat "Sigh" he huffed pinching the bridge of his nose "you need to attend the academy as the Idiot, the worse in your class he should hold off that way." "but I'm almost certain he will send people to observe you." he lowered his hat to cover his eyes. "after you become a ninja he wont have any hold over you." ' your telling me I have to pretend to be an idiot for two years.' "pfff" I started laughing to the point I felt weak in the knee's "oh my god! this is hilarious that sounds fun old man!" his eyes widened in shock as the blond kept waling. "when do I start?" he said wiping the tears away. "tomorrow at eight. I will have clothes waiting for you at your apartment. you HAVE to wear them its part of your image." he said with an evil glint in his eyes.

(FLASH BACK OVER) +Thousands of furbies )

(NO ONES POINT OF VIEW)

 

'fuck these clothes' he growled pulling the hem of the orange and blue jacket down. "shit" he grumbled before stumbling into his classroom that was already in a lesson "sorry I woke up late!" he yelled squint smiling with his hands behind his head. the entire room glanced at him before going back to what they were doing "Naruto right?" a man with brown hair tied back and a large scar over his nose asked "Yep that's me Naruto Uzumaki!" he exclaimed making the teachers sweat drop. "my name is Iruka I'm your homeroom teacher. you can go to the back and sit beside Sasuke" he pointed to a black haired kid with duck butt hair who just glared out the window as a wave of screeching girls fought to talk to him 'great I get to sit next to an emo' "Thanks sensei!" he made his way up to his seat pushing through the crowd of girls only to be stopped by a pink haired donkey "WHAT ARE YOU DOING I'M SITTING NEXT TO MY SASUKE!!" the girl squealed but the only thing Naruto could translate was 'NEE HAW NEE HAW NEE HAW!!!' he swore he could feel her spitting on him as she kept braying "EVERY ONE SIT DOWN!" Iruka yelled using his big head no jutsu. Sakura quickly slid in next to Sasuke leaving Naruto standing there while everyone took their seats "uh um" "WHAT!" she screeched making the whole class look at her even Sasuke began rubbing his temple. sakura went back to fawning over him as he had finally showed some sort of movement. "Sakura please go to your assigned seat" the teacher said from the front of the class. sakura looked over to her sensei and put on a pout 'is that suppose to be cute' Naruto thought. "But Sensei." she looked teary "please" she sniffled "no that's Naruto's seat and Sakura we all know you won't focus if your next to Sasuke" he said sternly 'I also cant deal with her screaming all day' Iruka sighed. suddenly Sakura's eye brows furrowed making her huge forehead wrinkle glaring at Naruto before returning to normal and whispering "I'll see you at lunch honey" before scooting off the bench and shoving the blond with her shoulder and sitting at her seat.

(SASUKE'S POINT OF VIEW CAUSE I CAN)

'that sakura just called me honey does she think were dating or something' a shiver went through his spin just thinking about dating her 'it can never happen though because at this point he's starting to think he's gay. suddenly he felt someone sit next to him so he glanced over to see a blond boy with blue eyes 'now that I look closer he is actually cute if he wasn't wearing that disgusting orange jump suit he also seems pretty stupid from his earlier entrance.'

in the middle of the lesson he felt a tap on his shoulder so he turned to look at the blond to see his hand out to shake hands and a way to huge of a smile on his face. I was about to grab his hand when he spoke "I'M NARUTO UZUMAKI!" he paused "I HOPE WE CAN BE FRIENDS DUCKBUTT!" he yelled for the whole class to hear I quickly turned scowling 'now he's on my hit list that dobe doesn't know what fan girls can do' I smirked hearing screams all over the room from sakura of course the loudest.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sorry I'm not good at getting the story to progress.

(2 years later) (Sasuke's point of view) I arrived early at the academy like I always do to have some quiet before the screeching started. it was silent as he sat their waiting for someone to come in hopefully not one of the girls :'{ *thud* I looked up to the sound of the door shutting seeing Naruto silently walking to his seat next to me "what are you wearing dobe?" I asked slightly blushing as Naruto scooted in next to me. Naruto was wearing black Anbu pants that had black wrappings up to his knees and black sandals along with a tight black long sleeved shirt with a blue Uzumaki sign on the back. "clothes" he stated coldly glancing at me making me blush harder. "don't you usually wear that ugly orange jump suit?" I asked still blushing slightly. "Wow Sasuke said a sentence without hn'ing you need a medal good for you" he said patting me on the back. 'what the hells wrong with him I don't hn all the time!" (flash back) "Sasuke isn't Naruto and idiot!" "hn" "yes Sasuke?" "hn" "oh sensei he means to say he needs to go potty" Naruto jumped up laughing making Sasuke glare at him. "is that true Sasuke do you need the bathroom?" Iruka asked "hn" he nodded. "SASUKE KUN~ LETS GO ON A DATE!!" Sakura screamed "hn" her face lit up and she began squealing "HE SAID YES!! TAKE THAT INO PIG!" 'I meant no..' his sweat dropped (probably shouldn't read the next part) O-O Sitting on the toilet he was trying to release a big one with a huge push "HNNN!" *plop* OMG rereading this was hilarious OMFG LMFAO (flash back over) 'I don't....' he was driven out of his thought by a horde of students entering the class and sitting in there seats a few girls surrounded the seat where Naruto and Sasuke were sitting. "omg your so hot what's your name~" one of the girls purred to Naruto bending over and trying to show off her non existent cleavage. (I mean seriously their what like TWELVE. she also said O.M.G not oh my god) "Are you serious that's Naruto!" one of the guys behind us yelled. they all gawked at him then sneers crossed their faces the girl who called out to him looked absolutely disgusted. "what's with your getup! just because you change your clothes you think you can sit by Sasuke!" a girl screamed lifting her hand to smack him when they heard a donkey and another girl fighting their way into the classroom. "IM FIRST INO PIG!!" the pink donkey screeched dementedly to the point where it cant even be human. "NO! MY FOOT WAS WAY AHEAD OF YOURS!" the blonde blimp screamed.(no idea where that came from but yeah) the screeching continued all the way up to me and Naruto all the other girls panicked and ran to their seats terrified by the thought of their eardrums getting destroyed like the last girl who wouldn't let sakura get to Naruto "Hinata" (I'm sorry this is not a naruhina fanfic) she is now deaf but due to her being a Hyuuga she was aloud to become a ninja despite her disability. in the corner of my eye I could see Naruto laying down with his head next to where I'm sitting taking up the two spaces on the bench. "hn what are you doing Dobe?" his mouth opened but was cut off by Sakura. "SASUKE kun~ can I SIT here" she said blushing slightly and not even noticing Naruto. 'what is she not able to stop yelling it fades in and out what the fuck.' "WHAT IM SITTING NEXT TO SASUKE BILLBOARD BROW!!" ino screamed hip bumping her, hard. "WHAT YOU BITCH WHY WOULD SASUKE kun~ WANT TO SIT NEXT TO A PIG! HEEHAW!" she brayed at the end "eeyore is real" Naruto said wonder shining in his eyes. I inwardly laugh my ass off but outside all I gave was my super MANLY "hn" (Naruto's point of view) "WHO THE FUCK CALLED ME EEYORE!" she screeched looking around franticly still not noticing me. "I did" I said looking disinterested. her face immediately shot down towards me "~KIT!!~" Kurama screamed making me flinch 'what!?' I thought angrily at him for his sudden outburst. "~I'll have you know eeyore is a donkey~" I furrowed my eyebrows at this. 'and your point is?' "~....well.. I like donkeys~" he spoke proudly 'ok what the fuck Kurama so your saying you like sakura!?' "~n-no I- I don't like her she's not even close to a donk-" he got cut off when I felt sakura latch onto my foot. 'DID THIS BITCH JUST TOUCH ME!!' "~calm down kit she only touched you! you can't kill her!~"Kurama pleaded I was beating the shit out of a wall in my mindscape but kept my face to the minimum of a scowl but she obviously noticed me scowling and trying to hold back my glare. "WHAT ARE YOU FROWNING AT! GET OUT OF MY SEAT YOU TRASH!" she spat trying to tug me off but I just took my foot out of her grip sliding up and sitting on the end of the bench so she couldn't sit. "Naruto I swear I'm gonna!" she stopped noticing Iruka standing in the front with the look of disappointment on his face in the way his students couldn't solve a simple matter such as sitting without turning to violence. 'he must be thinking something like "so childish" bitch WERE TWELVE!' I thought to Kurama and hearing him make a creepy Barnie laugh. (shivers) I see sakura turn and sit across the room making me smirk slightly. "today is graduation day so you will be taking two tests for your taijuutsu and ninjutsu (if that's how its spelt) each test is worth fifty points you must get at least seventy points to pass and become a genin." everyone in the room started whispering and I swear a tick mark formed on Iruka's head but he continued anyway. "half of you will be with Mizuki and the other half will be with me." 'oh the guy sent by Danzo to spy on me for two years I figured it out instantly when I came here it wasn't like he was subtle about his staring. at first he was cautious but after a month he just assumed I was actually stupid. I can see why Danzo needs good anbu because this one is probably only chuunin level and is pretty stupid. when I came back from my thoughts half the class was gone along with Sasuke. "Ok my half follow me!" Mizuki yelled and everyone lined up and headed toward the small training field. (Mizuki's point of view) I stopped at the training field and inspected the small group that were already in a straight line in front of me. my eyes scanned Naruto's figure and I felt a small blush come across my face. 'what is he wearing!? trying to act cool I bet.' "ok I need to see your shuriken and kunai throwing skills. one at a time" I said holding my pen and clipboard. all the students did well and Naruto barely passed. 'I knew it Danzo must want me to watch him because he knows I'm skilled enough to take down the Kyuubi!' I felt myself fill with pride. all the taijutsu test's Naruto just barely passed and lots of younger students failed. (AND back to Naruto) *huff* (its 3:00 am I'll need to do some serious editing later) so far I've been playing it safe around Mizuki to make sure I graduate before revealing my strength making sure to just barley pass. the next part is ninjutsu and again I make sure to pass but just barely. after all the tests every one went home. after a moment alone in the classroom I decided just to leave, standing from the bench I shot I quick glance out the window seeing Mizuki jumping into a tree. 'might as well figure out what Danzo wants.' *sigh* (later that night) I followed Mizuki to a cave hidden by bush and seals, Danzo's hideout Root, I'm guessing I have been here but every anbu that leaves Root are forced to forget most information about it. concealing my chakra and any sort of presence that I had not already concealed by habit I slid into the cave unnoticed by the anbu and waited in the hall I knew they would meet. I watched as he went through the security measures and headed to the center of the oval room and waited. a minute passed and Danzo finally showed wearing his stupid white and black kimono and bandages that cover his sharingan arm and eye that he thinks no one knows about. "Report" was the only thing he said as he eyed Mizuki. "Yes Danzo sama" he bowed "Naruto Uzumaki barely passed the ninja exam and I believe that he wont make it past the real exam with his sensei being Hatake Kakashi" he said raising his head. "good as long as he fails" he hissed out. "um if I may ask sir? why are you so Interested in him?" the older man scoffed but decided to answer anyway. "I have reason to believe he has the potential to unlocking the rinnegan. he was also one of the strongest anbu I had, even at the age of five." Mizuki's jaw hit the floor and he looked at Danzo in disbelief. Danzo just mumbled "but he was pushed to the breaking point" only audible enough that Mizuki couldn't hear but with my heightened senses I heard all of it. I slid out the same way I came in and started jumping through the tree's. 'well he is pretty far off about the rinnegan and by the sound of it he thinks I had a mental breakdown or something and turned pathetic from all the abuse the villagers gave me.' a smile crept across my face "time to graduate."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (sorry about Hinata and turning sakura into an ass literally) XD
> 
> I'll try to get into a posting schedule so yeah most likely one a week.
> 
> *mumbles incoherently* Tsunade I really want to write her as the hokage" *grumbles*
> 
> .................
> 
> *snore*


	3. Team 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (I honestly started this story on a whim but It will go on!) I don't own any pictures or Naruto.
> 
> just wanna say I mean no offence to donkeys or anyone. and if you like Sakura that's ok cause seriously I actually like her... but I like writing bitches better. XD

I open my eyes but ended up squinting them from the sun peaking into my open window. sitting up in my bed I looked over to my clock that read 5:30 am. *sigh* 'I always wake up to early.' I grumbled getting up and changing into my anbu pants with wrapping up my shin and a baggy light purple tee shirt that had black letters saying "Donkeys 4 Life" I was always amused by the looks I got. ( :} ) 

after I finished my giggling I quickly made myself some eggs and bacon and finished my morning routine. once I slipped my black sandals on I walked out my door trying to ignore the new words on it saying "demon" or "die" and other blurred out carvings from before.

I have seals around my apartment so no one can come in without my consent but it doesn't stop them from trying. "they never learn." I thought aloud as I shunshined to my training grounds in the forest of death. when I was younger the first thing I taught myself other than all the basics that I changed to my own style not having anyone to teach me other than Kurama that is. but it turns out the mighty Kyuubi cant do Shinobi hand to hand combat AT ALL. was seals which made my life so much easier not having to worry about villagers or Shinobi entering and attacking me while I sleep, it also allowed me to hide my training grounds. I let out a audible breath making it visible in the cold air.

after a while of strength training such as running with extra gravity weights on top of my normal ones and practicing my Hiraishin I checked the time seeing it was now eight and I had to head to the academy. 'Kurama.' I thought walking down the village road ignoring the glares I got. "~whaaat~" he yawned making me giggle probably to cutley because I saw a few men turn red and some women hitting they're husbands.

'I'm guessing jiji will put me on a team with the uchiha to watch him and probably teach him about his sharingan Kakashi certainly cant.' I scoffed. 'he's only figured out how to copy he cant even use genjutsu with his eye.' I said in my mindscape that was now a big field with tall grass and flowers."And your telling me this why?" he said in a monotone voice rolling to his side on the grass bed. 'just giving you a reason to stay awake." I snickered entering the main academy doors into the hallway and continued walking to my class.

 

(donkeys ah uh I mean sakura's pov)

I got up early today so I could be alone with my Sasuke~ before Naruto! and the rest of the class show up. I batted my eyelashes adorably in the mirror looking at my perfect curves from stuffing my bra. 'I'm so hot! heehaw!' my inner me squealed.

I quickly ran into the empty class seeing Sasuke sitting at his desk with his chin on his hand gazing beautifully out the window. "SASUKE~!" I yelled my voice was so harmonic it caused me to blush more. I sat next to him as close as I could get touching his shoulder. he didn't even look at me his face just turned slightly darker. 'he must be suppressing his desire for me! haw!'

after a while of him refusing to speak to me he finally opened his soft lips making his manly jaw move to speak. "what do you think about Naruto?" was all he said in his gruff voice. 'yes Sasuke talk to me more...' I was entranced by his voice but reality hit me. 'he's talking about the Demon!' "why do you care about him? he's just a loser." I said blushing from being able to have a conversation with my love.

"hn, never mind I shouldn't have asked." he turned away from me the back of his hair brushed against my nose. my face was beet red and blood trickled down my nose. 'OH MY GOD!! HAAAW! HE SMELLS LIKE TEA!!!' I felt like passing out when the door opened revealing a pretty cute Naruto. "GO AWAY NARUTO!" I screamed forgetting about Sasuke. he just walked up the stairs ignoring me and sitting in front of us.

"DONT IGNORE ME! HEEHAW!" he just turned his head looking disgusted 'HoW DaRe He LoOk At Me LiKe ThAt!' his nose scrunched and he began speaking. "Eeyore your bloods getting in your bra stuffing." he said loathsomely pointing to my chest. I shot my eyes down noticing he was right my blood from my nose was getting in my top. "nooo! I just bought that! now I've got to go back to socks!" I screamed but realized Sasuke was still beside me. "I'll be right back Sasuke KUN~" I said running past Naruto down to the door. I looked back and glared at the Idiot before leaving.

 

(Naruto's POV)

Eeyore glared at me before finally leaving. *sigh* I laid my head down looking up to the clock it was 7:45 am class started at eight. 'jeez Umino should be here now.' I yawned crawling through the grass over to Kurama in my mindscape. *grumble* "sleep.." he mumbled pulling me up against his chest. I snickered when I felt his chest rumbling in a purr "fine." I said snuggling into his warm fur.

(half an hour later)

I woke up to Iruka's big head jutsu screaming at my face. "Now lets get back to listing the teams." he said grabbing a paper from his desk. I sighed, dammit such a nice sleep too. I straightened out deciding to listen. "Team seven, Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura, Uchiha Sasuke." Sakura jumped on to her desk screaming. "TAKE THAT INO PIG!" 'god why me.. I'm gonna kill that old man!' I was releasing a bit of KI making the whole class shudder and sakura look fearful stepping down and sitting back in her seat shaking. "~is it that bad~?" Kurama questioned as I was getting ahold of myself and the teacher started reading again "Team eight..." 'of course it is! she's so useless right now and she's a fan girl putting her in a team with the one she fangirling over is going to ruin our teamwork!' I yelled slumping into my chair.

"~I don't know about sakura but Sasuke has been eyeing you for forever. I think he likes you~" he teased making me smirk. 'I know. this could be amusing.' I snickered and realized the class has already gotten picked up by their sensei's so it was just us three. I spun around on the bench looking up at Sasuke. "so you enjoying the weather?" I asked casually. he just looked at me like I was crazy but still answered. "no." he said coldly turning his head back. I rolled my eyes and laid down with my hands behind my head. oh did I forget to mention my hitai-ate is tied around my neck and I'm wearing a black blue and purple open jacket? well now you know.

two hours passed so I decided to pull a prank because well why not? I slid off the bench and started walking to the classroom door grabbing a chalkboard eraser on the way. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" Eeyore screamed making me flinch from the abrupt loudness. "prank." was all I said stepping on a stool and putting the eraser in the cracked open door.

another hour passed when a silver haired Jonin walked in the trap.

(Kakashi POV)

arriving at the academy three hours late, somehow it made me feel... satisfied? I walked though the door noticing the stupid prank but entered anyway.'even the little things could be made with team work'. I thought looking at group of children. 'the Uchiha doesn't seem interested and the pinky looked like she was doing her best not to laugh and at the same time blaming "Naruto"' I looked around till I caught site of an attractive boy looking at me with an unreadable expression. 'Iruka's still cuter. hehehe.'

I eye smiled at them "my first impression of you guys... I hate you." I said bluntly watching Sasuke scowl and pinky face plant. "meet me on the roof." I eye smiled before I shunshined to the roof. a second later I saw the blonde appear out of no where sitting down. 'how did he get here so fast?' I thought. 'I better keep an eye on him'. the other two came up looking shocked that Naruto was there but just sat down.

(Sasuke POV)

"so how about we introduce ourselves." he smiled making his eye into a U shape. being the idiot sakura was she asked what to say. 'hn has she never introduced herself?' I glared at her slightly. "well how about your likes, dislikes, future dreams, hobbies, things like that." he said nonchalantly crossing his arms over his chest. "hey before that could you tell us about yourself?" Sakura asked scooting closer to me. "me?" he pointed to himself. "well I'm Hatake Kakashi. I don't feel like telling you guys about my likes and dislikes." I cringed. "I've never really thought about my future dream... as for my hobbies, I have many." he eye smiled I saw sakura sneer at the man while Naruto just blankly looked off into space.

"ok now you pinky." he pointed at Sakura. "um I'm Haruno Sakura. The thing I like... I mean, who I like is..." glances at ME. "My hobby is, I mean..." blushes at me. 'she better not be stalking me...' "My future dream is..." *KYAAAA!* she squealed shoving her face in her hands. "and what about your dislikes?" Kakashi sweat dropped. she looked up still blushing "Naruto." she said bluntly. I looked towards Naruto for a reaction but he just looked... bored. I looked back to Kakashi who had a knowing look on his face looking between me and Naruto. I felt my face heat up when he gave me a thumbs up. "now you emo." I grimaced at the nickname but ignored it.

"My name is Uchiha Sasuke. I have lots of dislikes and I don't like most things." I quickly shot a glance at Naruto who actually looked interested in what I was saying. I smirked "I don't feel like summoning up my ambition as just a dream. an ambition to rebuild my clan, and without fail.. to kill a certain man." I looked at Naruto who looked sort of... disappointed?


	4. Pervert

(Naruto's point of view)

I looked back to Hatake not wanting to look at the duck ass anymore. 'so oblivious, I can't stand people like him.' I growled to kurama. "~Now, now kit we both know you would never let duck over here kill Itachi, it's not his fault he is oblivious either.~" The demons voice boomed through my mind. He's right, but Sasuke didn't even second guess that he did it to test his strength. I glared at the ground oblivious that kakashi was signaling for my turn next. 

(No POV)

"Umm Blondie?" Kakashi waved his hands the boy shot a glare at Kakashi making him scoot back against the railing of the building. "I'm Uzumaki Nam- um naruto." He stuttered every one looked at him to continue even the cyclops who looked pretty shaken. "I like kura, and jiji." he continued the others questioned who "jiji" and "kura" were.

(Sasuke pov)

I felt an ache in my chest as he mentioned other peoples names and not mine... wait why do I care if he likes me? I pondered.

(Naruto's POV)

"I hate a lot of things a bit to much to say so ill state a few." he brought his hand to his mouth clearing his throat a bit with his eyes closed. "well for one I would say clueless power hungry dicks." I glared at Sasuke "~wow kit you didn't call him duck!~" Kurama laughed. 

Sasuke looked a bit hurt but quickly put his emotionless mask back on. meanwhile Donkey looked between the two dumbly and Kakashi just eyed me suspiciously. "oh perverts, and that ass sitting next to me." I gestured to sakura but she still seemed confused. Kakashi nodded and was about to speak but I cut him off. "I have a goal but I wont tell you it." I copied his famous eye smile at him. he looked annoyed at me but continued to go on about our "survival training" or whatever and before he left he smiled sheepishly and told us not to eat cause we'll puke. I sighed before standing from my seat on the stairs and began walking to the ledge of the building. 

"bAKA! IF YOU FALL OFF BECAUSE OF YOUR SUPIDITY I WONT SAVE YOU!!!" "right Sasuke kuun~" she purred hearts in her eyes. 'I cant deal with this...' I grumbled turning around and giving a pouty expression. "duck will save me right?" I questioned looking as adorable as I could towards the emo. they both looked shocked, then Sasuke's cheeks tinted red. he looked away from me, his face turning redder. "hn, I would." he said fiddling with his fingers and not even noticing I called him duck. "hawwww!!!!!" sakura brayed glaring angrily at me. 'wow that KI is "sooo strong."' I thought sarcastically dodging her hoof coming to my face. she looked shocked and ran back at me with her fist behind her preparing to thrust it forward. 'sigh' I jumped out of the way onto the railing along the side of the building and watched her punch the metal bar hearing a small crack. "AHHHHH!!!" she screamed holding her wrist in the air. "you broke my hand!!!!" she screamed tears streaming down her makeup blotched face. (ok maybe I'm going to far) "technically you broke it." I said calmly before turning around and teleporting to my shitty apartment.

'I kinda feel bad...' I thought walking to my bed laying down. "~you should.~" my eyes widened hearing kura say that. "~think about it. how is she supposed to do her makeup kit!~" I rolled my eyes. 'seriously! use her other hand dip shit!" he puffed out his cheeks "~I'm not a dipshit.~" he wined. 'whatever helps you sleep at night." I drawled walking out of my dump. he shot one of his demon glares. "~lets just go see the old man.~" he said turning to face another direction 'fine but your not making me ask him about the new icha icha book!' I thought walking down the street towards the Hokage tower. "~what!~" he growled "~i am the great kyuubi no kitsune!!! The-" "yeah yeah the king of the foxes." I interrupted he just huffed flopping down into the grass I decided to ignore his grumbling and focus on where I was going.

once I made it to the tower I just decided to walk past the sleeping guard its to bothersome to deal with their thousands of questions as to "why the demon brat should be allowed to see the Hokage." 'sigh' i walked to the big door to the Hokage's office.

I could here rustling and some mumbling. 'if he makes me do his paper work!' i thought gritting my teeth as I entered the unsecured office. the old man was looking through scrolls rather quickly "um jiji?" i said making my presence known. "oh thank god Naruto!" he said relieved running toward me with a scroll in hand. "wha-what!" i backed up from the panting man, suddenly he grabbed my shoulders and looked right into my eyes. "Naruto i have an important mission for you." he stated not breaking eye contact "what is it?" i asked just as serious he looked even more determined squeezing my shoulders a bit. "i need you to deliver a scroll to the sannin Jiraiya. its of the upmost importance."

he pushed the scroll to my chest. i took it and looked back at the elder as he sat back in his chair still surrounded by papers and scrolls. I peered back to the black scroll debating wether i should open it or not. 'mmhhh!! fuck it I'm just gonna look.' "~your such a bastard kit~" 'shut it you beast!' i pulled loose the scroll and unrolled it. "what no that's classified!!" the geezer cried standing from his desk, ignoring him i read the bold letters. 

 

to Jiraiya of the Sannin

 

the Hokage has requested one of your limited edition icha icha paradise 

refusing orders from the Hokage will lead to you being on house arrest for one year to write more books for your icha icha series.

I expect it here in the week.

 

sincerely your sensei, Hiruzen~

 

(no POV)

without a moments notice the boy used a fire technique in the palm of his hand burning the scroll to a crisp. "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!!" the aged man yelled palming the ashes together. Naruto grew a dark aura around him growling sinisterly, "you expect me to deliver that!" he growled. "na- now calm d-down Naruto." he stuttered holding his soot covered hands defensively. Naruto grabbed a fistful of Hiruzen's beard when Shikaku burst into the office.

"what are you doing?" looking at the scene before him, Lord Hokage was kneeling with his hands up defensively while a kid was hold his beard firmly. Naruto swiftly let go of Hiruzen and took a step back, "ah, Shikaku. what business do you have here?" he asked standing up looking toward the scarred man. "ah, um, well. *sigh* I need you to create a new training regiment for a squad and there up coming mission." he huffed holding his forehead. "ah I see, bring me the scroll." he smiled sitting in his desk wiping his hands clean with a hankie.

 

(Naruto POV)

 

'HE HAS A Handkerchief!' "~don't be mean kit he's old~" Kurama said seriously. 'I don't give a shit if he's old that's just gross!! he probably blew his nose with that, hell he probably wiped his ass with that! and washed it so he could use it again!' I thought outraged as I watched Nara and Jiji talk over a scroll. "~lets just go I wanna sleep~" he grumbled. 'cant you sleep now?' he rolled his big red slitted demon eyes at me, "~you know I cant sleep well without you.~" I just smiled at him devilishly. 'fine but your taking over during the stupid survival training tomorrow~' I teased. his eyes narrowed at me "~fine but no ramen for THREE days~" he smirked, 'I think your over estimating my need for ramen, ku~ra~ma~' I giggled going back to reality. they were still chatting so I decided just to leave.

after teleporting home I took a quick shower and ate a pickle (cause why not)and got under the covers, it was only 5:28 pm but who cares, I can have some time to read in my mindscape.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Again no offence to donkeys or people with hankies)
> 
> I do not own Naruto or any of the pictures.


	5. Kurama

I like writing Kurama x Naruto fluff its so cute!

 

 

 

(Kurama's POV)

My roar bounced off mountain tops, animals scurried away from my huge form. "~Yes, I AM THE KING!~" I bellowed puffing my chest out in pride. "No your not." A monotone voice rung out of no where. "~WHAT!!! Who dared to say that!~" I glared around the woods searching for the source of the voice. "I'm right here you over grown cat." my glare shot down to the blonde headed boy. "~YOU LITTLE SHIT! NARUTO!!!~" 

My eyes shot open to find I was still in the grassy field where I fell asleep. 'goddammit even in my dreams...' I was brought out of my thoughts by a hand waving in front of my eye. "why'd ya scream my name?" he asked flopping onto my head. "~I didn't~" I blushed putting my head down onto my paws. "gasp!" he put a hand to his chest "was it a sex dream!!" he yelled horrified. "~ why the hell would I get a sex dream about you and a human no less~" I shivered at the thought. "sniff" I felt wet drops falling onto my fur 'what! is he crying!?' he slid off my head standing in front of my muzzle. "you... don't love me?" he sobbed. "~what! um no of course I do kit, I love you like my little brother.~" I cooed trying to calm the young boy.

"Great!" his demeanor instantly changed. "so you haven't forgot your promise right?" he looked at me innocently. I just stared my mouth hung open. 'this BRAT!' I grew an irk mark. "~what promise!~" I growled. "You know about you doing the "survival training" for me." He smirked devilishly. 'shit.' "~fine. but don't forget about the Ramen.~" he just smiled at me and stuck out his fist. I rolled my eyes bumping my fist with his.

It took a second for me get full control of his body but me being me, I did it. "hmm how should I embarrass him?" I spoke dryly in his voice.

(no POV)

a whiskered boy dug through his closet throwing clothes out of it until he found his trademark jumpsuit. a disturbing smile plastered his face "hehehe, this is going to be hilarious." after he changed and put a bunch of hair spray in his hair making it stickup in different directions, he shoveled cereal down his throat. *Burp* 'welp better get going' he looked at the clock 6:00am. 'am I late?' he put a hand to his chin. "well I wont be later than the perv so I'm good." he smiled putting his hands into a seal before disappearing in a cloud of smoke.

(Sasuke's POV)

me and the ass were waiting at the training ground since five! and the only thing I could here was Sakura's squealing and my empty stomach. 'why the hell isn't Naruto here yet?' I grumbled folding my arms tightly across my chest. "DONKEEEY!" Naruto's voice yelled out of no where and he flew into Sakura causing her to fall with him squeezing the life out of her. "na Naruto!" she huffed out. I just casually watched the exchange of him hugging her and her nearly dying in the process. "donkey is your hand okay?" he sniffled looking up to her with his baby blue eyes. she blushed looking away and lifting her hand to show him. "oh my god!!! nooo!! the gods have ruined your beautiful finger!!!" He screaming into her hand crying, she had a cast on her pinky. "um... technically you did it." she rolled her eyes shoving him off her. "why are you so late?" I finally spoke up stepping forward. he just looked at me teary eyed and smiled. "it took me a while to find my clothes." he gave a cocky grin pointing to his orange jumpsuit. 'oh god no! not again!' 

(Kurama/Naruto's POV)

I just sat on the ground looking up to him cutely, suddenly I felt Kakashi jump into a tree nearby observing us. '~jeez this guy~' I mumbled darkly. I stood up from my spot on the ground the other two slinked away from me probably feeling my killer intent. "~Kakashi~ I know your up there~" I said playfully but sinisterly making him shake so hard you could see the branch he was on shake. he jumped down trying to compose himself but failing. "eh um, good morning." he scratched the back of his neck sheepishly but sweating bullets. 'I cant believe he was an anbu and on my team once.' the kit said through our mindscape. '~I know right. I only released less then half my KI~' he just huffed slumping into his meditating posture. '~you really collecting nature chakra in your mindscape?~' he peaked one eye open 'yes I already told you I'm storing it for later use.' he pointed to a sealed off area with a ball of green chakra floating in the middle covered in sealing tags. 'shouldn't you be paying attention to Kakashi?' he hummed. '~oh shit!~'

"if you cant get these bells you'll be tied to those poles while I eat my lunch in front of you." the cyclops said innocently. "WHAAAAT!!!" I slapped my hands over my ears. "tch." duck butt glared at the cherry blossom noticing me writhing in pain on my knees. "Naruto are you ok?" Kakashi said in concern. '~shit how the hell did Naruto last so long with her wailing!~' 'I told you she was a howler.' he mocked amused. "~lets just start the goddamn 'survival training." I stood from the ground. "ah yeah sure." He smiled. "Ready-" I cut him off by disappearing. "Well I guess go." He irked the other two just stood their awkwardly for I minute before jumping off. "Nap." I grumbled laying down on the tree branch. 'Your not even gonna try?' Kit asked still collecting nature chakra. "~why should I?~" I mumbled curling around him. *sigh* 'your so lazy.' "~so are you.~" I teased. 

(Kakashi POV)

I spread my chakra out to sense my soon to be genins, I found sakura first she wasn't even attempting to hide her chakra and Sasuke's chakra is flexing like he's trying to suppress it. 'Now where's the idiot?' I couldn't sense him anywhere. 'Weird. Did he leave?' I grabbed my book out of my pocket and began reading only half paying attention to sakuras chakra getting closer to me. "I will be the Heroine to Sasuke Kun's Emo!!!!" She screamed flying put of the bushes towards me with a kunai in her hand. 'Seriously.' I looked at her lazily as she ran at me with the speed of a toddler. *sigh* why me... I teleported crouching behind her and put my hands into the tiger seal. "Whaaat!!" She cried. "Hidden leaf jutsu! One thousand years of death!" I shoved my fingers up her ass. She blushed and just fell over foam coming out of her mouth. I had to use a great amount of force just to get my fingers out. 'What kind of ass does she have' I thought amazed looking at my fingers.

(Sasuke POV)

I watched Kakashi struggle to pull his fingers put of sakura. 'Disgusting.' I thought in distain. 'I wonder where Naruto is... Hn.' I jumped around searching for the adorable blonde. But when I found him to my surprise he was sleeping peacefully against the base of a tree. His hair blew in the wind shining when the sun peaked through the cloudy skies and onto his tan skin his whisker marks more prominent. 'Cute.' I blushed leaning closer to him. My face was inches away from his our mouths almost touching when the bell sounded and his red slitted eyes shot open. I stumbled back falling onto my butt. "That was a nice nap." He stretched his hands over his head eyes back to normal. "Oh Duckbutt. Good morning." He gave me a toothy grin. "Hn." I stood and began walking back to the training grounds. "Hun" he mimicked following me. 

(Kuruma POV)

 

"you realize I have to pass. unless you want us to be thrown in a cell and tortured until we become a dog for Danzo." he hummed still collecting nature chakra. "~well how the hell do I get a bell from him I cant do fucking taijutsu!!~" I growled "well how about ninjutsu!" he yelled annoyed. "~fine!!~" 

we got back to the posts only to find Sakura tied up and passed out. "um what happened to her?" I pointed at the pink hunched over girl. "hn." he just looked appalled and continued to walk up to Kakashi. "where were you Naruto." the cyclops asked sternly while I was debating with myself. "I was here the whole time?" I asked seemingly confused. I tilted my head to the side "did I do something wrong?" I asked teary eyed. 

 

(Kakashi POV)

 

I could feel my cheeks heating up and... well some reaction happening elsewhere. "no no I understand don't cry." I cooed bending over to his height. "really." he sniffed rubbing his eye. in the corner of my eye I could see Sasuke seeping with jealousy his hand were fisted so hard he was bleeding. "really." I reassured ignoring him. suddenly he latched on to me sniffling in my shoulder. "now now." I tried to calm him patting his back. abruptly he jumped back holding the two bells and smiling sinisterly. "thanks ~sensei~" I shivered from his tone of voice. "ah I see." I tried not to show how startled I was. "so, who are you going to give a bell to?" he shrugged throwing a bell to Sasuke who fumbled before catching it and he placed the other one on top of the banshee's head. "I don't want your pity..." Sasuke grunted shoving the bell back towards him. " I guess I have no choice." I sighed "you pass." I smiled. they both looked at me shocked and sakura... well she twitched... "great! so can I go home?" Naruto asked. "sure meet here tomorrow at the same time. " I smiled.

 

(no POV)

 

the three of them began walking away into the sunset leaving a now conscious sakura screaming through her gag. "I'm hungry." Sasuke blushed looking the other way. "me to. you wanna come to my place?" the blonde boy offered smirking eerily unseen by the other two. "can I come to?" Kakashi asked sheepishly. "sure. but you got to do my dishes." he smiled brightly and began running in the direction of the slums.

 

 

 

 

(I've got some big plans for this story now, I've written a plan so I have more confidence in the chapters I'm writing so they'll be updated sooner it will also be a bit.. bit deeper than now. so yeah....-,,- I'm gonna edit so it all fits together so if you wanna reread it go ahead when I'm done editing ill change the cover.) byeeeeeee!

**Author's Note:**

> (donkeys for life)
> 
> think of braying like neighing except from a donkey/mule
> 
> oh and if you didn't notice I really hate sakura so I'm making her into a clingy bitch <3
> 
> I don't own the Naruto picture :'(


End file.
